Bert Landau
On Thanksgiving, 2022, I learned that one of my favorite people, Jerry Lyons, had passed away. He had a very short but extremely difficult struggle at the end. When Pam, his beloved daughter, called me, I immediately shed more tears than I thought possible.
For some time now, I have called him “Uncle Jerry.” He accepted that role…and sometimes he called me “nephew.” But he was a lot more than an uncle to me. Despite the sometimes blustery and loud demeanor, he actually was more like a close and loving older brother or even at times a father than a somewhat more distant uncle. Most of the time, we would have lunch or dinner together, frequently two or three times each week. When we could, we always tried to help each other.
Like the times when he wasn’t feeling quite well enough to drive from Tucson to Coronado, I’d fly back and drive him over. Or when I did my own taxes a few years ago — and it looked like I owed something north of $50K to Uncle Sam, Uncle Jerry looked at my tax documents and, sure enough, Jerry assured me I had done it correctly and owed over $50K. Or those several times he decided he needed a newer and faster computer, I’d take him shopping on a nearby military base or at Costco.
Sometimes, we argued but it was always over who was going to pay the bill for dinner. He often accused me of cheating because I would covertly give the waiter my credit card when we were seated. But, the last meal we had together, and perhaps the last time he left the house, was for dinner together on Veterans Day. The restaurant we selected offered a free meal for veterans on this holiday. That covered both of us. But they charged us $3.85 for the iced tea he ordered - I had fun kidding him about how this might push me into default on my credit card.
On our last drive, returning from the restaurant with the charge for the iced tea. Jerry “adjusted” one of his earlier observations that I might be crazy for enjoying giving kindness anonymously to strangers. He had decided it was a good thing and that I should continue. My uncle [or Older Brother] at last approved of my hobby!
Uncle Jerry, if you can hear me, remember that I love you …… and will always miss you. Good older brothers are hard to find and even harder to lose.